Tag Archives: British

In Praise of British Slang ~ A Poem

A short time ago, I had the privilege of speaking to an English author who is also a wonderful poet. During our conversation, he asked if I was still writing poetry. The question caught me off guard. I don’t write poetry regularly and have not done so since working on my current novel.

It got me thinking though, because I adored his English accent and way of speaking. He used words and phrasing I never hear in conversation with friends—which I found both amusing and endearing. As Canadians, we have adopted British words in our day-to-day language, but there are many we don’t use.

It also amazed me to discover how much of British slang sounds vulgar, even when the words are not. Some of the words in my poem may be regional or outdated, but they entertained me nonetheless. Brits can comment and tell me if I’ve made a twit of myself.

I hope you enjoy this short poem inspired by a special Englishman. I know he fancies wordplay and has a healthy sense of humour (that’s humour with a second ‘u’ since I’m being British and all). 😉



In Praise of British Slang

The dog’s bollocks is the best
But bollocks alone is rubbish
And rubbish is actually garbage
Don’t speak it; throw it in a bin

If you spend a penny in England
Expect to be in the loo
But if you get diddled while in there
Check that you still have all your pennies

No point fannying around
As the arse is the ass
And the fanny is not the arse
It’s the female naughty bits

And what of the John Thomas or Todger?
Found on a mate, a bloke, or a codger
So many names to describe a plonker
There should be as many words for a lughole

You may think I’m barmy or bladdered
I’m neither, just a wee bit knackered
In need of a good eight hours
And I’ll be full of beans again

Yes I do love many things British
The language, the slang, the humour
A dry cocktail of irony and wit
Perfect for taking the piss



Filed under Revelations & Humor, Short Stories & Poetry

Being Anal is a Pain in the WHAT?

Some friends call me picky, pedantic, a perfectionist. They’re just being nice … I call myself anal, and sometimes it’s a real pain in my backside. Yes, backside – a word that Mitt Romney, the nominee for the Republican Party for the President of the United States used recently in London.

This is not a politically motivated post, no worries. I won’t bash Mr. Romney even though he criticized the biggest sporting event Britain has held in over forty years and said:  “… looking out of the backside of 10 Downing Street.”

This post is about the English language – more specifically, the difference between British English and American English.

As a Canadian, I have the best of both worlds. I’ve grown up with both. I know the difference in their spellings, and I’ve familiarized myself with the nuances of British idioms and words, but let’s face it folks, although the word “backside” can mean “the rear view of something” as in this:

I can assure you this is NOT 10 Downing Street.

The word backside is more aptly visualized as a different rear view.

You KNOW this is not what I meant.

Regardless, I did some research on the word as I know many Brits were offended by Mr. Romney’s gaffe. The word backside does appear to be a North American term. It refers to the rear side of something, but for both the British and Americans, it’s also a word used informally to refer to a person’s buttocks.

I almost feel sorry for Mr. Romney. His every move is being scrutinized, and his poor choice of words didn’t help win him any points on his first foreign tour as a presidential candidate. I’ve written about words and their impact to communication in a previous post.

Our misuse of words will not make any headlines, but for someone running for the highest office in the land, Mr. Romney may just need to watch his backside a bit more closely.



Filed under Revelations & Humor

Inside the Author’s Mind – India Drummond

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Filed under Author & Artist Interviews